yucca_isnt_porn: (Default)
It's dark outside.

Granted it was dark when Mother actually parked the RV to spend the night in a farmer's field. The owner of the land is too far away to notice the guy who was using his back forty to park and sleep for the night.

And considering that Mother had once again, pulled a marathon of driving through the terrain, it was mutual that they stop at least for the night and sleep. One conspiracy-nut mad scientist in sprawled face-first in his bed, still in his clothes, and one magi-tech kitsune dozing in her private little space.

At least until some snorting noise outside, too faint for Mother to hear, started the little hairs on the back of her neck up.
yucca_isnt_porn: (wtf)
It's the day after their little romp through Salt Lake City.

Amazingly it's still standing, but that may be due to where Mother's chosen to go today.

A deserted parking lot on the outskirts of town. Here, only boggled wildlife can witness what is about to happen.

Mother's going to teach Laini about driving.

"Alright, were you able to read the manual on the way over here?"

"I could prolly dissect this car and put it back together again in working order, if that's what you mean."

"...can you tell me what the important parts do?"

"Cruise control is not autopilot, that triangle switch is not an ejector seat; it's for the hazard lights, and it's bad to shift without using the clutch because it strips the gears."

"Good."

"Hands on the wheels at all times."

"Right!"

"Even if it means I have to grow an extra pair."

"...........................what?"

----------------------
2 hours later.
----------------------

"Okay, we've got the basics of manuvering and parking down. I'll co-pilot and run you through all the nice little manners humans are supposed to, but don't always use with the car."

"Such as?"

"Polite highway following distance is a four-second count behind the guy in front of you. Something passes by his rear bumper you want to count four...what's so funny?"

"Nothing, nothing...carry on."

---------------------

"Okay, that's enough city driving for today."

"What?"

"We've been circling the block for an hour. That cop is giving us the hairy eyeball."

"But we're not..."

"Just pull over and parallel park."

*whomp*

"Oh quit hitting your head on the dashboard. Student driver! He's going to forgive me jumping the curb."
yucca_isnt_porn: (conspiracy)
He was dead.

Actually he was even worse than dead, even worse off than the guys in section Z, who had to worry about their flesh falling off.

Two hours were wasted, along with that 4 hour lead the deranged bastard had on him, before R actually remembered just what else was in Utah.

And his initial survey of the Utah University campus proved to be a spot-on guess, even if he was by far too late to catch up with Roskow and whoever he was travelling with. The tourguide and the computer systems weren't his MO, which meant, possibly the guy was being used..or an accomplice to someone with a far greater range of talents.

Talents that included disguise.

R stared at his MiBlackberry and chugged down a fresh bottle of peptobismol.

None of the above would account for why he was going to be dead soon.

And he would have to make the call.

"Jesus fucking took a dump on a Krylian...Roskow, of all the faces you had to wear..."

-beep!-

"R! There had better be some good news!"

He was going to end up in the bottom of MiB with W for this, he just knew it.
yucca_isnt_porn: (conspiracy)
There was good news to be had the next morning, (actually it was noon when Mother woke up coherently again. He didn't even notice the RV having been put onto a riser. At least not until he opened the door...) un what little there was... The various frontframe mods built to kept the sensor array upright had kept the engine from becoming seriously damaged, there was only a little damage to the radiator and that would only take a week to get proper parts for.

The repair shop had even been kind enough to lend the two a loaner car to roam about the area with for a bit.

At least that's what Mother thought.

Laini's money bought a wide variety of things that made everything alright.

And with a clean get away car...it was only right Mother take Laini somewhere enjoyable and metropolitan.

That meant only one place.

"Salt lake City in 6 miles, Laini..."

After THIS

Oct. 5th, 2009 09:12 pm
yucca_isnt_porn: (conspiracy)
The very next day, after the RV had been towed away from the ditch and hauled to the repair shop...

On an abandoned stretch of road, miles from anywhere a boxy black ford pulled up to the side of the road and a young man with red hair in a black suit stepped out and took in the surroundings. There in the ditch were the remains of some sort of sensor array. And not too far off was the smell of burnt grease and flesh.

What little hope Agent R in the MiB had of having something appraching the day as usual for an average agent went away very quickly, hiking up towards the source of the smell.

"....oooooh boy."

Three seconds after making the call to headquarters the boss finally picked up.

"R! Where the HELL are you and why are you calling my office."

"It's about that party crasher sir, out in Utah."

"Good. Where?"

"...ooh...over there, up on the rock, on top of that bush, over there, up there and down there."

"Wonderful." Pause. "Who do we have to thank for this?"

Whatever his boss had in mind...it wasn't a handshake.

"You're going to love this."

"I'm all a tingle."

"Earth tech from the looks of it. There's a crash site, some RV tracks and the remains of someone's homebrew sensor array about 500 feet from where I'm standing, and human tracks leading to the point of disintegration."

"Get on who or whatever did this. I'm still dealing with the Hephastians over their ding dong ditch."

"Got it chief."

---------------
Two hours later.
---------------

R strode out of the repair shop and back into his car, before driving back to the scene of where it all happened.

Maybe neuralyzing himself would spare him the horror of having to explain how their least favorite conspiracy theorist had done this.

Maybe not.

"Boss."

"What've you got R."

"Darryl...'Mother'...Roskow."
yucca_isnt_porn: (do not want)
After Laini bailed on him in the RV, it was just one long event with Utah's po po. The condoms and explosives? Totally circumstantial evidence, much though the cops try to wrangle him otherwise. Even the inflatible sheep could've been that.

He's just being held on the grounds that he was driving without license plates, and they need to see if he really DOES own that Winnabago. That's the official reason.


------------------------------

"What's the VIN number register to?"

"One Darryl Roskow, resident of San Francisco."

"Any priors?"

"Several counts of trespassing, disturbing the piece, felony mischeif, ...one grand theft auto, breaking and entering, and transportation of stolen goods, filed by a college professor."

"...run that last one by me again?"

------------------------------

Mother has not been a happy little prankster since his partner left him to hang. He's lucky they didn't throw him into the cells with the crotch-biters and maniacs, but into a seperate holding cell after they tried interrogating him. The looks on their faces at him attempting to explain the prank on the dean was priceless though, for what little that was worth.
-----------------------------

"Okay, run this by me one last time. You have a prior of grand theft auto for..."

"For taking apart the dean's car and rebuilding it in his office."

"...do I want to know why?"

"He cancelled the engineer's gadget battles and movie night."

"...And you thought this was funny?"

"No, I thought the guys who thought it up were brilliant. I was just look out."

"..."

"I owed one of them fifty bucks for losing a gadget battle."
----------------------------

Maybe they just didn't want him giving the others ideas.

----------------------------

"You'll stay in here until we get this sorted out. No funny business."

----------------------------

Really, who would have thought jail would be so boring? There was nothing to do now but stare at the ceiling and play out possible explanations while laying on the cot in the cell.
yucca_isnt_porn: (mwaha)
In the Nevada desert, night is fast approaching over the exquisite scenery. Scenery that as soon as darkness falls, has one Winnebago that wasn't there five seconds ago, parked in some brush and a little ways off the road. It's completely loaded down with gear and for the moment has no license plates.
yucca_isnt_porn: (oh crap)
When you're about to do some massive structual and landscaping damage to any area, you have to do some shopping. And sadly, the Winnebago, while nicely stocked for the trip and stuffed to the brim with equipment, doesn't have enough stuff to really knock any sort of reasonable dent.

Mother just doesn't have access to that kind of explosive, and really is somewhat self-preserving in the fact that he knows he shouldn't handle that much boom. However, that being said, he did plan ahead for this trip, and if he really wants to drive Black Mesa's secret alien agenda to bits...

He just wants to make sure he has EVERYTHING.

Which is why he has the address of every sex-toy shop on Nevada, and is mapping out a route for visiting as many as possible in a single day.

"Okay, Laini? Our first supply stop is here."
yucca_isnt_porn: (kicked puppy)
After the mountain, Mother'd been driving pretty much like a bat out of hell with the RV. Going as fast and far as caffeine and adrenaline will take him.

However about 11 hours later...

"First bar I see I'm pulling in for a drink and we'll be staying the night."
yucca_isnt_porn: (mwaha)
Portland, Oregon.

There are a great many things to be said about the city of roses, it's fair garden-lined streets in springtime, the many restaurants and theatres, and it's strong grunge scene.

Darryl 'Mother' Roskow is not the HELL interested in any of those things. His entire reason for coming to this rainy state, is located in the lava fields. These are just a bit south of the city, in the state park of Mt. Saint Hilary. And while the park ranger may have given his RV a few odd looks for all the hardware it was hauling on it, he had been allowed to pass into the statepark to view the volcano cauldron. Or as close to the cauldron as was humanly possible, given the roads and the RV's size.

"Thiiiiis may be harder than I thought."
yucca_isnt_porn: (:D)
For the past few weeks since the events of chip that doesn't exist, Mother has been a bit more of himself. He's been watching everything that goes on outside of his apartment and the office like some kind of kid skulking by the christmas tree with the clunky family camcorder and a pot of coffee hoping to see either Santa or the Martians dropping off a christmas present.

Actually, the office probably doesn't need the 40 something geek propped up on his elbows with various video cameras watching the streets like a constipated hawk... And they probably haven't needed it for the past few days either.

But thank GOD finally, Darryl 'Mother' Roskow has passed out at the window after pulling several all-nighters.
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